Perhaps those words are the thoughts of someone who hides them well enough for different reasons, Larus' face scrunching slightly as it just pours out of Dorian with the same eloquence as always. But the things he says ache with familiarity, things he's told himself and has been told by others. By Sun, mostly, which is hilariously ironic given the nature of his maker. Still, he's heard it before, and as always, his only weapon to fight back with is his honesty. He doesn't have much else when it comes to something like this; of anyone in this city, it's Dorian he wants to hurt the least. ]
I care, [ he admits lightly, parsing through it even as he holds him there with Dorian's hands between them. ] Why do you think I go out there? I don't enjoy it. There's no peace; at least the Dusk made more sense that way.
[ But Duplicity is sprawling, and its control is everywhere. He has a literal reminder of it tattooed permanently on his skin, and he'd given some of his own autonomy to the man now questioning his, what? Morals? His feelings? They've only ever briefly touched on the subject of something like that, and even with the sex that had followed...
Larus frowns, his expression twisting. ]
You're careless when it comes to other people, Dorian, and I'm trying to protect you from that. [ He only knows of Grayson Frost and not even to the full extent. It's hard to say what other dealings he's made without mentioning them. ] So call me whatever it is you want. I know I'm a monster. That's something I never asked for, but it doesn't mean I'm heartless.
[ Larus leans closer, close enough to feel Dorian's breath on his skin. ]
If I didn't care [ he swallows around the words about you and pushes on, ] I wouldn't be here.
no subject
Perhaps those words are the thoughts of someone who hides them well enough for different reasons, Larus' face scrunching slightly as it just pours out of Dorian with the same eloquence as always. But the things he says ache with familiarity, things he's told himself and has been told by others. By Sun, mostly, which is hilariously ironic given the nature of his maker. Still, he's heard it before, and as always, his only weapon to fight back with is his honesty. He doesn't have much else when it comes to something like this; of anyone in this city, it's Dorian he wants to hurt the least. ]
I care, [ he admits lightly, parsing through it even as he holds him there with Dorian's hands between them. ] Why do you think I go out there? I don't enjoy it. There's no peace; at least the Dusk made more sense that way.
[ But Duplicity is sprawling, and its control is everywhere. He has a literal reminder of it tattooed permanently on his skin, and he'd given some of his own autonomy to the man now questioning his, what? Morals? His feelings? They've only ever briefly touched on the subject of something like that, and even with the sex that had followed...
Larus frowns, his expression twisting. ]
You're careless when it comes to other people, Dorian, and I'm trying to protect you from that. [ He only knows of Grayson Frost and not even to the full extent. It's hard to say what other dealings he's made without mentioning them. ] So call me whatever it is you want. I know I'm a monster. That's something I never asked for, but it doesn't mean I'm heartless.
[ Larus leans closer, close enough to feel Dorian's breath on his skin. ]
If I didn't care [ he swallows around the words about you and pushes on, ] I wouldn't be here.