"Well," Dorian starts, once he's taken in everything that Toby's said. These concerns are along the lines of things he's heard from the vampire before, or conversations they've had in earlier months. It's not something Dorian has much more to say about that he hasn't already before, but he can try to be of use in a way he didn't before: by offering some direction. "That's one way of looking at it, and one that's kept you from moving past where you started with all of this, hasn't it?" Sensing a deep conversation coming, Dorian shifts some so he can better face his lover, preserving their closeness by settling his legs over the other man's thighs.
"If you ask me, the truth is that if you're waiting for a time when taking a step forward won't feel like a risk, that time isn't going to come. What happened with those people happened, and your feelings about what you did aren't going to change." Not unless Toby gets a sudden and unexpected personality transplant.
"But the difference now is that you have me. If you decide to take this risk with me, I'll be on the other end of it no matter what." It's been proven to him time and again that the only person Toby will ever accept absolving or saving him is himself, so he can't and won't try to promise that. And anyway, he absolved Toby the second he revealed that he drank from people to numb pain, and survive. It wasn't a good choice and the ensuing actions weren't 'good', but it isn't that simple to him. When is anything in their lives ever that black or white? "It could be that the only way it might get easier is by taking risks and finding out that the reality doesn't add up to all you've built it up to be in your mind." But either way, Dorian's of the opinion that nothing ever changes (whether it's something in a relationship, regarding a decision to try and detox, or something else) until someone takes action. Thinking about it isn't enough.
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"If you ask me, the truth is that if you're waiting for a time when taking a step forward won't feel like a risk, that time isn't going to come. What happened with those people happened, and your feelings about what you did aren't going to change." Not unless Toby gets a sudden and unexpected personality transplant.
"But the difference now is that you have me. If you decide to take this risk with me, I'll be on the other end of it no matter what." It's been proven to him time and again that the only person Toby will ever accept absolving or saving him is himself, so he can't and won't try to promise that. And anyway, he absolved Toby the second he revealed that he drank from people to numb pain, and survive. It wasn't a good choice and the ensuing actions weren't 'good', but it isn't that simple to him. When is anything in their lives ever that black or white? "It could be that the only way it might get easier is by taking risks and finding out that the reality doesn't add up to all you've built it up to be in your mind." But either way, Dorian's of the opinion that nothing ever changes (whether it's something in a relationship, regarding a decision to try and detox, or something else) until someone takes action. Thinking about it isn't enough.