rockandrollvampire: (Yeah Really)
Tobias Matthews (Toby) ([personal profile] rockandrollvampire) wrote in [personal profile] mayfairmonster 2024-01-21 06:46 am (UTC)

November 18, 2023 - 6:59 PM

[There's a click of a lighter and a chuckle as the call starts.]

I know, earlier than my usual, but I had to laugh with you about something. [A long, slow exhale after a drag on his smoke.]

You know those quota challenges they've been assigning? How they're supposed to be hard for people? This month's is to have sex seven days in a row. Only seven, and people are complaining all the time! [He raises his voice in terrible mimicry of a random stranger.] "That's so many days! What if my dick or my cunt get tired? What if I miss a day by minutes?!"

[It's so ridiculous that he can't keep it up and dissolves into a fit of laughter.] I was done days ago, of course. If you'd been here, I would've been done the 7th. These people are so dramatic about sex. It's the funniest thing.

[A long pause, and his voice is a little sad as he adds:] Just thought you'd like the laugh as much as I do.

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